Independent Music News is a big fan of In Earnest. No, scrap that, I’d chop off a toe to hear any new release by the alternative indie band. Pass the knife, Tony. What? They have a new single out tomorrow called Put Me Under, and I can premiere it. Well then, young lad, email that over straight away. Pass a bandage too. Quickly though, the blood is rapidly escaping my body, and I feel faint.
Before I pass out on the floor, I must tell you about Put Me Under. If you like sad music with a hint of self-realisation, then this is the song for you. Play it in the background as you look in the mirror at your overhanging gut, while a potential lover on Tinder cracks way too many self-deprecating jokes, and when you’re in A&E after you’ve cut off a body part because you adore a band way too much. No! Don’t whack it on in the bedroom as Paul plays with your balls. This is a tune that will cure your inhibitions, slap you round the face and tell you to everything’s going to be ok. It’s sensitive and caring, and I love it. Kiss.
Damn! I feel ten times better after listening to Put Me Under. Oi, you over there. Yes, you. I have a little surprise that you’ll enjoy. No, don’t run away. I’m not going to murder you. Put your hand in my pocket. What do you feel? A fresh and juicy song by In Earnest. Take it home, get naked and play it loud. Today’s going to be a good day, Tony. Look after yourself. Before you leave, can you call an ambulance? Thanks.